You Must Remember This

by Martin Hill Ortiz

About the Author: Martin Hill Ortiz teaches Pharmacology at the Ponce Health Sciences University in Puerto Rico where he lives. Along with three novels, he has had over twenty-five stories in print including Philosophy 101 appearing in Mystery Weekly Magazine's recent anthology, Die Laughing: An Anthology of Humorous Mysteries.

Excerpt

"All I'm saying is, if the moon did hit your eye like a great pizza pie, well that would be nothing like amore. It would probably kill you."

"Shuddup."

"I'm not saying it's possible. The moon is pretty far out there, not too mention, big-mama-ass huge. I'm just saying if it did somehow come down for a surprise stopover and would choose to smack you, that's fatal."

"Shuddup, already."

"And even if you only got hit in the eye with a pizza pie that would hurt a bunch too. Probably burn. Especially if it was fresh out of the oven."

"Shuddup, shuddup, shuddup."

"Amore is different from all that, that's all what I'm saying."

In one deft motion, Joey pulled his automatic and pressed its muzzle to Vance's temple. Joey said, "You understand now? You understand what I'm saying when I tell you, shuddup?"

"Okay, okay, already. I get your point," Vance said. Joey slid his gun back into his jacket. "It's just, you know, a stakeout is boring. And I saw that sweet-ass moon up there looking like it was mooning us. When I saw it, I remembered up that song."

"Listen, stakeouts are supposed to be boring. We do nothing flagrant or the mark gets wind. For example, if I got to whack you to keep your yammer shut, well—that would be a stink-pie level of flagrancy."

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